Pride May Be The One Thing Keeping You From Forgiving Others

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We often have a hard time forgiving others because we don’t have a true understanding of what forgiveness is. Our pride makes us think that if we forgive, we are letting the person who has offended us “off the hook.” We think we are valuing the other person’s needs and desires over our own if we forgive them, and are in essence communicating to them that they are free to harm us again.  

None of this is true -- forgiveness is none of the above.  Forgiveness does not give the offender the right to continue the hurtful behavior. They can and should be held accountable for their actions and be made to understand your rights to healthy boundaries.

In reality, forgiveness is simply agreeing with God that He has the sole rights to justice and vengeance. It is not your role to punish the offender, but this is in many cases what our pride wants us to feel. We must recognize who God is and trust Him with the outcome, not allowing our pride to thrust us into God’s role.

By choosing to forgive others, we are actually responding in humility to God, allowing Him to be the judge. This does not mean we are the victim, nor must we allow the offense or any sort of abuse to occur again. We may never have reconciliation with that person and may never be able to be around them again, but we can move on free of that person, leaving them in God’s hands.

Forgiveness is clearly more about our relationship with God than with others. And our pride is often the root cause of any trouble in this relationship. We must remember that forgiveness has more to do with our attitude than with any other person’s actions.

Sometimes, our pride gets in the way by telling us that withholding our forgiveness gives us power over the person who has offended us. Again, this is a lie, and we must lay that pride aside, recognizing that only God has power over others.